How to Feel Worthy of the Life You Deserve
It is so wonderful to live in a time where terms like manifesting, attracting and co-creating have become mainstream. It’s so inspiring that we can openly share our favourite miracle making techniques, be they dream boards or wish lists or guided visualizations. And while we are empowered with these practical and spiritual tools, sometimes it can seem like the only thing we are good at manifesting is struggle and frustration. Not only that, but even when we actually realize our dreams, we may keep ourselves from feeling secure, content and grateful enough to fully enjoy their fruition.
At the root of all this strife often lies a common saboteur: the false belief that we are not good enough, innately guilty, faulty and ultimately, unworthy. Whether this belief is conscious or unconscious, it can act like a pesky, pervasive weed that keeps our desires from blossoming in the garden of our lives. When we reconnect with our inherent worth as an eternal soul, however, something miraculous happens inside of us, allowing us to invite and embrace the good we seek outside of us.
Looking back on my own healing journey, I have realized that in addition to transformational tools like yoga and meditation, there were three specific steps that helped me uproot the weed of unworthiness and allow my life to flourish. If you are ready to embrace your own worth and own your true value so you can experience the abundantly blessed life you deserve, here is the three-step process that helped me get there and works wonderfully for my clients:
1. Re-evaluate: It’s Not About What You Do or Have
In spite of their best efforts and intentions, even the most loving parents can condition us to internalize the false idea that we earn our good so long as we act a certain way. Many of us actually had parents who couldn’t demonstrate the unconditional love and acceptance we needed because they themselves were disconnected from their own truth, making our wound of unworthiness even deeper.
As we enter school and eventually the “real” world, everyone from our friends to teachers to bosses and partners contribute to us feeling important or inadequate based on what we do and how we do it. If we give into the illusion that our value is based on our performance and accomplishment in the world, our sense of self will always fluctuate with ever-changing opinions and conditions.
The first step to repairing your self-worth then is to free yourself of the misconception that your deservedness is tied to things outside of you. While we should do our best in every moment, we don’t ever need to earn our good or prove ourselves to be rewarded and supported by life. As explained in the next step, our true worth lies in who we are, not in what we do or have.
2. Recover: It’s About Who You Are
The second key to healing your self-worth is to remember your true nature as an eternally worthy and valuable child of the universe. As a loving creation and extension of the divine, you are no more and no less special and deserving than anyone else who ever lived. When you remember that you are Spirit manifest, you rest in the truth that your worth exists because you exist. It’s that simple. It’s that beautiful.
3. Reclaim: Own Your True Identity
While you may conceptually understand that you are an unconditionally loved child of the Divine, embodying this truth can take committed inner work after a lifetime of false conditioning. The work here is to uproot the weeds of negative, ego-based beliefs about your little self so that the inner seeds of your true Self can finally sprout and flourish.
To begin the process of owning your divine worth, start by acknowledging all the small thoughts you have about yourself. Turn this into a ritual – which sends a powerful message to your subconscious and has profound effects – and take some time to write all these beliefs out on a sheet of paper. This will help bring your deepest, darkest thoughts into the light. Once you feel you’ve gotten everything out, set an intention to bless and release these self-negating patterns on all levels and in every way, and then ceremoniously (and safely) burn the paper. This alchemically and metaphorically represents a powerful act of transformation and transmutation of all that was burned and released.
Once the smoke has cleared, initiate a new beginning (maybe even light some nice smelling incense) by starting a traditional mantra sadhana (daily spiritual practice) focused on embracing your divine nature. Mantras are ancient, sacred sounds that have the power to heal and transcend all blocks and bring mental, emotional, physical and spiritual transformation.
Specific mantras for embracing and embodying your divine worth include, So hum, Meaning “I am That or “I Am all that is”; Ahem Prema, which means “I am divine love” and Aham Brahmasmi , meaning “the core of my being is the ultimate reality, the root and ground of the universe, the source of all that exists.” All of these mantras will help you recover and reclaim your infinite worth and enternal value, so choose one that resonates with you. Then, recite your new mantra 108 times every day for 40 days to experience an inner shift to divine worthiness, and 90 days to really embody it.
As you take steps to release false beliefs and remember the truth of who you are, you return home to your beautiful, unchangeable and infallible self – your spirit- where everything you seek already exists. From this space, you embrace the manifestation of your human dreams and desires with open arms. Centered in your inherent worth, you grow gracefully, receive gratefully and share graciously. So go ahead and start reclaiming your invaluableness – you deserve it!